28 July 2026
(PHOTO: Courtesy of the interviewee)
Three children came into the family of Natalia Simak from Nova Odesa under different circumstances. Milana was only three months old when, due to her mother’s serious illness, she needed a safe family environment. Varvara was nearly eighteen when she lost her grandmother, who had been her guardian. And ten-year-old Nikita, Natalia’s nephew, lost his mother and went through a difficult ordeal.
Milana was the first to join the family. It was caring for her that eventually led Natalia and her husband to decide to become foster parents.
Three-month-old Milana came to live with the Simak family at the start of the full-scale invasion. The girl’s biological mother had abandoned her, and child welfare services suggested that the family become foster parents and take the girl in. The couple agreed, completed training for prospective adoptive parents, gathered the necessary documents, and went through the required procedures.
Natalia’s older children accepted Milana right away. Her eldest son, who is currently studying at a medical college, used to take her for walks when she was a baby, push her in her stroller, and play with her. “Now, when he comes home, the first thing she does is shout ‘Bodia’ and run into his arms,” says Natalia.
The arrival of the little one changed the family’s usual routine. Natalia worked from home as a manicurist and initially juggled her work with caring for Milana. When the girl got a little older, started walking, and began actively exploring everything around her, Natalia adjusted her work schedule for a while so she could be there for her. “She’s very energetic,” explains Natalia.
Over time, the family developed a new daily routine. And the experience of caring for Milana marked the beginning of foster parenting for Natalia and her husband: later, they agreed to take in two more children who needed a family.
After Milana, Varvara joined the Simak family. She was nearly eighteen at the time. She was attending a local vocational school and living with her grandmother, who was her legal guardian. Natalia knew both of them, but they weren’t close.
When her grandmother died, Varvara was left without an adult who could support her with daily life, her studies, and everyday decisions. That’s when the head of the child welfare service reached out to Natalia.
“She invited us to her office and said, ‘There’s this girl—do you have the ability or desire to help? She’s in school, but she’s on her own now,’” Natalia recalls.
Varvara, who was almost an adult, didn’t need daily care, but she did need adults around her—to support her with her studies, paperwork, and her first independent decisions.
Varvara is twenty now. She has completed her first year of college in Mykolaiv. Technically, she’ll remain in the foster family until she’s 23, but Natalia says that in real life, this bond goes far beyond paperwork.
“She calls me Mom. And we understand that even after she turns 23, when she leaves the foster family, she’ll still be with us,” says Natalia.
The third member of the family is Natalia’s 10-year-old nephew, Nikita. After his mother’s death, the boy lived in Odesa with his grandmother and went through a difficult time. One night, he ran away, after which the Odessa Child Welfare Service contacted Natalia. She and her husband then decided to take Nikita into their family.
“I knew I was his biological aunt. I couldn’t not take him in,” she recalls.
Her husband supported this decision. He said, “Let’s get ready,” and they drove to Odesa to bring Nikita home.
Nikita’s adjustment turned out to be the most difficult part for the family. At home, he’s withdrawn, but when he’s with friends or playing online games, Natalia sees an active, attentive teenager who can clearly express his thoughts. She suspects that this behavior might be a coping mechanism stemming from his past experiences.
Natalia understands that the family can reach out for support if needed. Child Welfare Services remains in contact and is ready to help if any difficulties or questions arise. For now, Natalia is trying to gradually build trust: she explains the house rules to Nikita, asks how he’s feeling, and observes how he interacts with other children.
Supporting families after a child is placed is important not only during the paperwork phase. Adults may also need advice from a psychologist, a social worker, or Child Welfare Services, as a child’s adjustment following a loss, a move, or a traumatic experience requires time and professional support.
In their daily lives, the children increasingly see themselves as part of one family. They call each other brothers and sisters, play together, talk, and spend time doing activities together. According to Natalia, sometimes they enjoy each other’s company so much that they are in no hurry to go to their own rooms, and she has to remind each of them of the rules. Such moments, while requiring patience, also show that a genuine emotional bond is forming between them.
Shared lunches and dinners, when everyone gathers around the same table, have become an important part of family life. It was during one of these conversations that Nikita, noticing Natalia’s tattoo, asked if she would let him get one just like it when he turned eighteen. For Natalia, this was a sign that the boy already sees his future—not just his present—as tied to this family. Such conversations often turn into heartfelt discussions of dreams, plans, and even fears, which helps the children feel supported and safe.
Attachment is evident precisely in these everyday details: Milana runs into her older brother’s arms, Varvara calls Natalia “Mom,” and Nikita talks about what will happen in a few years. The children are beginning to trust, open up, and seek advice, just as they would in a real family. Together, they celebrate small victories, support one another during difficult times, and gradually learn to be there for each other not only in times of joy but also in times of hardship.
“We realize we can’t go on without them. No matter how difficult it may be, they’re already a part of our lives. And we’ll be there for them,” says Natalia.
To find out how to welcome a child into your family, call the hotline at 0 800 219 867. For more details, visit dity.gov.ua.
The project “Resilient Families, Resilient Future: Transformation of the Child Care System in the Odesa and Mykolaiv Regions” is implemented by the International Charitable Foundation “Ukrainian Public Health Foundation” in partnership with the NGO “Odesa Regional Organization for Medical, Psychological, and Pedagogical Assistance of the NGO ‘Healthy Society,’” in collaboration with UNICEF Ukraine, with financial support from the Bundesministerium für wirtschaftliche Zusammenarbeit und Entwicklung (BMZ) through the state development bank KfW.
Олена Болган